A copy of my e mail

I sent a version of this letter below to all of my elected officials. I included in this previous POST an easy set click links where you can find and e mail some of yours. Feel free to copy and use my letter if you wish. I simply modified it as needed to each one.

Dear Governor Brown,
As you are quite aware someone has announced that Transgender persons are no longer welcome to serve our country. Then while the media is having a firestorm over that sudden announcement and as the senate -g o p- are dramatically playing out their “take the healthcare away from the poor and give the money to the rich” scheme, it seems the Department of Justice decides to submit an amicus brief stating that all LGBT Americans simply aren’t covered under the 1964 civil rights act because of who we are and who we love.
Whew, what a day of drama and side shows. I know that you and all of our governors, senators and representatives on the right side of history have your hands full. I want to personally thank you all for working toward a just, fair and equal society. I ask that you keep fighting for us and all of our rights as equal citizens no matter our sex, religion, race, sexual orientation, skin color, beliefs, age, pre-existing condition, income, social status and I think you know what I mean. Keep it up for us, for you, for the children and for our country. We need you.

Don’t be distracted by what they are saying, watch what they are doing

Today while we were distracted by all the other flying bullshit…the justice department quietly filed an amicus brief in a federal U.S. Court of appeals stating that the 1964 civil rights act DOES NOT PROTECT LGBT citizens.

Read more HERE.

By taking this stance the Department of Justice is saying that LGBTQ can be descriminated against in housing, employment, healthcare and beyond. The DOJ is saying that I can be descriminated against simply because I don’t fuck the opposite sex, that essentially I do not have any civil rights.

They are going after ALL of us and all of our civil rights. They are doing it right now. They aren’t doing it tomorrow, they are doing it now.

First it was the Muslims, then the Mexican & Central Americans and the immigrants, now the Trans and all LGBT. Who’s next? Almost everyone is next. Unless YOU take a stand for justice now you, YES YOU, are either under fire now or you are next.

Fearsome writes our President

Yesterday we felt helpless. Yesterday we did something to change that. Yesterday we contacted our representative and senators. We provided this LINK so you could as well. With the aide of that link it took us 10 minutes total to write all three.

This morning we wrote President Obama and Vice President Biden. I am sure that our letters are lost in a sea of letters and communications they are receiving but they are there. Without hundreds of thousands of letters just like ours, the importance of responsibility regarding this issue would not be forefront in our leaders agendas. Please write how you feel to each and every one of our leaders that represents you.

You can reach the White House for both Obama & Biden … by simply clicking right HERE.

Below is our letter. Feel free to use it as an example, write your own or even copy and paste it if your view is similar to Fearsome’s:

Dear President Obama,
Please do not delay in pushing forward responsible, sensible gun control. Assault weapons have no place outside of law enforcement and military use. Handguns need only be in the hands of thoroughly vetted responsible citizens and in limited numbers….if at all. The tragedies we endure can and must stop.
Freedoms are actually limited in a free society. They are limited by the freedoms infringement on the safety and security of fellow citizens. Of this I am sure you are quite aware. I believe in you and I rest assured that you will do the right thing by pushing forward and holding those controlled by the gun lobby responsible for our recent tragedies.
Thank you for your years of service. You are an inspiration. You have accomplished many great things and your legacy improves not only the United States, but the world as a whole. May sensible gun control become part of your legacy to the absolute best of your ability.
(Your name here)


Go Ahead….do something, say something….don’t let those lost in Orlando be lost without your voice expressing the necessity of responsibility.

Thank you.

Thank you Bruce Springsteen

The Boss stands with equality again. We knew he was a man of quality and honest good morals back when he recorded this song for the groundbreaking film Philadelphia.

Today he cancelled a concert scheduled for this Sunday in Greensboro North Carolina.

No one should be so discriminated against that  is living a life where their body of birth didn’t fit who they were and now that their body does resemble who they are….they are left with no bathroom to use in public. No one. Nor should a state government take away protections in place in localities only to mandate discrimination.

Mr. Springsteen is taking a stand that must be taken. I fully support him. I will stand with him by buying some of his tunes on iTunes today. Will you join me?



Motivational seminar and a walk down by the river

A couple days ago I blogged about the hard part of travel. The hard part is leaving behind the six dogs and The Better Half. It’s good to leave home though as it makes me appreciate what I have.

Where on earth did I take Fearsome this time you ask? Richmond Virginia for one of my Real Estate motivational seminars. A Brian Buffini Success tour to be more specific.

The Success Tour is two full days of great information, motivation, laughter and love. Yes love, lots of it. We Buffini agents are quite a supportive lot. There were about 2000 of us at this event. Brian brings along other speakers as well.


Both were great additions to Brian’s message. I am full and have much to contemplate. After two days of sitting and absorbing I walked out to a beautiful late afternoon springtime here in Richmond. I felt a good long walk was in order. So I took one winding through the historical streets of downtown Richmond and along the James River.

Fearsome Beard by the mighty James River

Fearsome Beard by the mighty James River

Fearsome Beard in cherry blossoms

Fearsome Beard in cherry blossoms

Fearsome Beard with tulips and the Capitol Building of the Commonwealth of Virginia

Fearsome Beard with tulips and the Capitol Building of the Commonwealth of Virginia

Fearsome Beard proudly stands in from of the Governor's Masion of Virginia. Virginia Governor Terry McAuliffe vetoed a bill that would have legalized LGBT discrimination just yesterday 3/30/16.

Fearsome Beard proudly stands in from of the Governor’s Masion of Virginia. Virginia Governor Terry McAuliffe vetoed a bill that would have legalized LGBT discrimination just yesterday 3/30/16.

Fearsome Beard at the entrance to a beautiful court building.

Fearsome Beard at the entrance to a beautiful court building.

Fearsome Beard with a statue of the most Fearsome Edgar Allen Poe.

Fearsome Beard with a statue of the most Fearsome Edgar Allen Poe.

Fearsome Beard on yet another quaint street of historic Richmond VA

Fearsome Beard on yet another quaint street of historic Richmond VA

We wish to send our wishes to a fellow blogger here in Richmond. We are sorry that our schedule did not match up with yours and hope that one day our paths may cross in the future. Tomorrow it is off to Roanoke to visit Mom for a few days. Wish us well on our drive down interstate 81. Until then….tooodleoo.


Homeless LGBT youth

Many LGBT youth from all walks of life find themselves rejected by their families. Some end up homeless just because they are different from what their families believe they should be. Many of those homeless youth end up on the streets of large cities.

The Ali Forney Center in New York feeds, houses, counsels and mentors youth from the streets of New York. Without the AFC many of these youth end up abused and lost in situations that most of us wouldn’t be able to even imagine.

Joe Jervis over at Joe.My.God posted earlier this evening that the Ali Forney Center has launched a capital campaign to buy a church on a prominent Harlem corner to house part of and expand its services. This church is particularly desirable to turn around the years of hate that have been spewed at the residents and youth of Harlem who just happen to be gay.

If helping homeless youth off the streets of New York and onto a path to a productive life as contributing members of an accepting society is something dear to your heart then click HERE to learn more. Yes …go ahead click HERE to make a donation. Click HERE to make a difference for someone who needs a hand up. Click HERE to send a message to a rejected youth that they are not rejected but accepted and loved. Click HERE and share on your blog or Facebook page to gain even more support from your circle.

Together we can trample hate from the past with love for tomorrow. Together we can do this. LET’S DO THIS!

We made our donation and would be honored for you to join us.


…and then summer 1970

The summer of 1970 between kindergarten and first grade I had an epiphany that I was yet to understand.

I had two older brothers, but they were much older and already in middle and high school. They loved sports and girls. I didn’t.

Next door there were two girls, one a couple years older in the same elementary school I was attending. Given not many other kids close by, Emily was my best friend. Her sister was older and boy crazy and Emily was starting to follow in her sister’s footsteps. Emily had a little transistor radio and we shared a favorite song. A song that defined our summer.

We spent many an hour playing Mystery Date and singing this song with Karen over the radio. I hadn’t heard this tune in years, but often reference it when I see a man I find attractive. I sing to myself the lines “On the day that you were born the Angels got together and decided to create a dream come true” as I look at the man of attraction of the moment.

Last night I thought of the tune and You Tubed it. As I sang the lyrics with Karen, knowing every single word, I was taken aback at how well she performs this song. No wonder it was a number one hit. It’s pure 1970 easy listening romantic kitsch, but her delivery and voice are beautifully perfect. I don’t think anyone of her era could have so amazingly performed it as she does. She sings it simply, easily, innocently and warmly with perfect timing and phrasing. Wow, I never thought I’d be giving that song such a glowing review …and to boot she’s the percussionist? I never knew that as little transistor radios didn’t have video.

Ok …by now you are getting the drift that this heavy metal listening bearded man that also has a fondness for disco and southern rock has a little warm spot for one particular Carpenter’s tune. Last night I figured it out. At that tender age I didn’t fully understand sexuality, today I do and I can look back.

I say that I always knew I was gay. I could reference the happenings that summer as evidence. Well it’s not just evidence but proof that I was always, and yes born a man attracted to other men. Emily was following in her older sisters footsteps by dreaming of boys. I was dreaming of boys right there with her. I wasn’t following my brothers lead, I didn’t want to. When we sang that song I dreamed of being close with a boy. A boy that had moon dust in his hair of gold and starlight in his eyes of blue. I didn’t know what sex was yet, but I knew what being close was. Close was being intimate, sharing, touching and caring. When we played Mystery Date I dreamed of being close, walking with, laughing with and holding the boy behind the door.

I didn’t know this was sexuality, I was too young. I just wanted to be close to a boy like a girl was close to a boy. I never wanted to be close to a girl like that. In my book girls had it made that boys wanted to be close to them.

I quickly learned that I wasn’t supposed to want a boy that way. I learned after that simple innocent summer with Emily, to hide my real self and present a false self. It’s unfortunate, but it was the time. That was then, this is now. Today I can be me. I no longer have to lie. I haven’t had to lie in years. Thank the universe. It sure is good to remember that innocent summer when I realized I was gay, that I loved the same sex.

“Why do birds suddenly appear? …Every time, you are near? …Just like me, …they long to be, Close to you.”


Coming in September

The base story is true, the movie embellished and charachters portrayed not necessarily exactly the ones responsible. Yes… Hollywood producers need the box office, however the story needs to be told and remembered. It was the ones actually there at Stonewall we can thank for where we are today. Stonewall jump-started the movement.

I wish to thank those  who rioted, as well as those who walked through the times after the riot.

(Credit for my finding this trailer goes out to Joe Jervis over at Joe.My.God)

Happy San Diego Pride!

I love San Diego and am proud to live here. It’s truly a wonderful place. We celebrate pride a few weeks after the other two large cities in the state. The scheduling gives us a chance to pop up to LA and San Francisco should we desire, and gives those up there the opportunity for a third celebration.

I’ve attended many a parade and festival. I’ve been in the parade a number of times. This year we had planned to go have breakfast on the parade route then escape to a friend’s pool party and have a quiet time with forty people enjoying the company in a quieter setting.

Instead we are moving today! Not ourselves but our niece & nephew. They recently closed on their first home and due to scheduling, today’s the day. Family is family and we are not going to leave them hanging. So we will miss the parade but we will still get out for a walk later this evening to see the festivities and a few friends along the way.

What, actually, is the meaning of Pride? As is my usual corse of action when I’m contemplating a word, a meaning, I think of my perception then look up the actual definition.


Pride is a good term for holding ones esteem high but I found a term that better fits me and what I feel as a gay man:


Worthy of honor or respect, that nails it. A good healthy self esteem about myself, about my culture, my tribe. Today I will feel dignity. I will honor myself, community, achievements, neighbors, friends and society. We have taken yet another step forward toward respecting diversity this year, a big step. I will celebrate life and all the colors of it.

San Diego Pride Parade

San Diego Pride Parade

Proud Service Members

Proud Service Members

Pride Costumes

Pride Costumes (Obligatory Beefcake)

May you have a Fearsomely Happy Pride Y’all!

Rising above

First I must give credit where it is due, I was made aware of this over on Joe.My.God.

The Oakland A’s have decided to have a LGBT night at one of their games this Season. Not anything new to me as the San Diego Padres have been having one night a year for the LGBT community for years now. It’s very common for different nights to be set apart for different segments of the community in baseball. There are 80 home games for each team every year. Designated nights allow for promotion of the team.

Apparently the LGBT night is new in Oakland and some of the season ticket holders are upset and do not want to attend. That’s their right. As a season ticket holder you can sell or trade your tickets.

What does an enlightened team player do to better a situation that is causing a controversy? How can one take lemons and make lemonade?

Oakland A’s pitcher, Sean Doolittle, has stepped up to the plate. He and his girlfriend have offered to purchase any disgruntled season ticket holders tickets at face value, which is more than a season ticket holder actually pays for them, and are going to donate the tickets to LGBTQ youth. This sticky situation is now a blessing to youth who are often cast offs.

Whats a good beard with a good conscience to do? Kudos to Sean Doolittle and his girlfriend Eriann for doing a good thing.

Oakland A's pitcher Sean Doolittle

Oakland A’s pitcher Sean Doolittle

If you wish to read more on it: