I have to admit that I love receiving Christmas Cards. I used to send them every year, but alas time became an issue as life got busier and I haven’t sent but just a few since the turn of the century.
We do still get a good number of them, even though we no longer reciprocate. I enjoy opening them and reminiscing about the friends who have taken the time to keep up the tradition. Maybe one day I’ll slow down and start the tradition again of sending holiday cards to my beloved friends and family.
Let’s say I enjoy all the cards with the exception of one we receive each year that has frankly started to creep me out.
A number of years ago we started to receive a Christmas card from a couple that was at the most a one time acquaintance and an acquaintance we don’t remember. We don’t know them, we don’t know where they live nor do we know what they do. We don’t share friends with them, a social circle or any interest that we are aware of.
Their cards are always professionally custom photographed showing the happy couple and their beautiful children. The photographs always number about 6-8 covering both outside and inside the card. They are always dressed in a matching theme and life looks as if it’s perfect…actually make that more than perfect.
In other words, the Christmas card itself is as disturbing as the fact it always arrives like clockwork the day after thanksgiving. Perfect card, perfect family and perfect timing, but who the fuck are they?
This years arrived like clockwork. However there was a new twist. The new twist was the fact it was, for the very first time, bulk mailed. Fucking bulk mailed. Yes the perfect stranger family has apparently grown their Christmas card list, of people who don’t know who the fuck they are, so large they are now using bulk mail.
Tom Watts – Christmas Card from a Hooker in Minneapolis