Motivational seminar and a walk down by the river

A couple days ago I blogged about the hard part of travel. The hard part is leaving behind the six dogs and The Better Half. It’s good to leave home though as it makes me appreciate what I have.

Where on earth did I take Fearsome this time you ask? Richmond Virginia for one of my Real Estate motivational seminars. A Brian Buffini Success tour to be more specific.

The Success Tour is two full days of great information, motivation, laughter and love. Yes love, lots of it. We Buffini agents are quite a supportive lot. There were about 2000 of us at this event. Brian brings along other speakers as well.


Both were great additions to Brian’s message. I am full and have much to contemplate. After two days of sitting and absorbing I walked out to a beautiful late afternoon springtime here in Richmond. I felt a good long walk was in order. So I took one winding through the historical streets of downtown Richmond and along the James River.

Fearsome Beard by the mighty James River

Fearsome Beard by the mighty James River

Fearsome Beard in cherry blossoms

Fearsome Beard in cherry blossoms

Fearsome Beard with tulips and the Capitol Building of the Commonwealth of Virginia

Fearsome Beard with tulips and the Capitol Building of the Commonwealth of Virginia

Fearsome Beard proudly stands in from of the Governor's Masion of Virginia. Virginia Governor Terry McAuliffe vetoed a bill that would have legalized LGBT discrimination just yesterday 3/30/16.

Fearsome Beard proudly stands in from of the Governor’s Masion of Virginia. Virginia Governor Terry McAuliffe vetoed a bill that would have legalized LGBT discrimination just yesterday 3/30/16.

Fearsome Beard at the entrance to a beautiful court building.

Fearsome Beard at the entrance to a beautiful court building.

Fearsome Beard with a statue of the most Fearsome Edgar Allen Poe.

Fearsome Beard with a statue of the most Fearsome Edgar Allen Poe.

Fearsome Beard on yet another quaint street of historic Richmond VA

Fearsome Beard on yet another quaint street of historic Richmond VA

We wish to send our wishes to a fellow blogger here in Richmond. We are sorry that our schedule did not match up with yours and hope that one day our paths may cross in the future. Tomorrow it is off to Roanoke to visit Mom for a few days. Wish us well on our drive down interstate 81. Until then….tooodleoo.


The hardest part

I love travel. I do it often.

The hardest part? Leaving the pups behind.



Just after boarding the plane headed back east this morning the better half sent me this photo. Isn’t she beautiful? I think so.

With anticipation I will see what adventures I find in this weeks east coast travel. I’ll make a few notes along the way. I hope you enjoy the ride along with me.

Get Naked with Yourself!

Sure it’s fun to get naked all by yourself. Go ahead do it. Even better do it in front of a mirror. Get naked and explore the beauty of your own body, your own skin. Touch yourself. Pull, lift, tug and look. Take it all in. Explore every niche, cranny, opening and surface. Get to know yourself. Take in every wrinkle, spot, color and texture. Self intimacy. Let it feel good.

Self intimacy is good for you. It’s pleasurable and life saving. Yes life saving. Especially if you don’t only do it with yourself, but do it with yourself and then share it with another. Share it with someone knowledgable and caring. Someone who may even give you tips on your body and even how you may better explore it.

In 2004 during an intimate moment with my own body, an intimate moment with a mirror in fact, I discovered a mole. An unusual mole. I called my doctor. He took one look at me and said oh that’s fine, but over here….what is this? How long have you had it? When replied I hadn’t noticed it before he took a closer look and called a colleague right there from the exam room in front of me. The colleague? A dermatologist. He wanted me to see her ASAP. She couldn’t right then but could take me the next day.

The next day in her office she asked where the mole was that had landed me in her office. I pointed to my side. She called her nurse for assistance then told me it was coming off as soon as she gave me a good search over in case there was anything else of concern. No nothing else, just the one. Numb, clean, clip….it was in a specimen container and off to the lab.

The call came five days later. Malignant Melanoma. Could I come in the next day? They needed to clear the margins and check my lymph nodes.

Margins being a huge hack of 3cm of flesh in each direction outward from the site cut out of my side and inwards toward my center….all clear. Lymph nodes….all clear. The mole was only 0.9mm deep. Just 0.1mm shy of a full mm deep that would have possibly moved me to stage 2. Close call. All clear of a stage 1 malignant melanoma.

She streesed that I talk with my siblings. Two brothers I have. She said that the highest risk factor is not from parent, but having a sibling. They need to be checked. I called both. I was very blunt and told them what she had said.

I am a messenger, not my brothers keeper. I can’t force them. Neither told their doctor. Neither got checked.

Fast forward 12 years. My eldest brother was hospitalized for a different matter and a chest X-ray revealed a spot on his lung. A biopsy & pet scan later the spot is a malignant melanoma tumor in his lung. There is melanoma in his lymph nodes and all probably coming from the quarter size melanoma on his neck. He is stage four now and no longer a candidate for surgical removal.

Mom just lost her husband of 62 years last September. The chances of my brother living more than another year are slim. I’m going out for a previously planned trip this week. The timing is good. I can check in with Mom as I know she isn’t taking this well. Losing a spouse at her age is expected. Losing a child isn’t what any parent wants to experience even if the child is sixty.

My other brother you ask? He made an appointment to see his doctor. Someone he can get naked with and learn how to get intimate with the characteristics of his naked skin.

Me? I’ve been cancer free for almost 12 years now. I see my dermatologist once a year at this point. I stay quite intimate with my naked self in the mirror.

You? Have you made a date with your mirror …and better yet your doctor… yet? You may not be my sibling but you are human. Humans of all skin colors get melanoma. You yourself are at risk as well. Do yourself a favor, have a little fun and get naked. Take a look at your beautiful self. Indulge in some caressing, tugging, lifting and looking. Touch, feel…go ahead get to know it all, all of your body. You might just save your life.





Now I know Y’alls know Fearsome loves him some Macklemore…

We’s a decided to post a Downtown video off with another Fearsome favorite Lady Antebellum…

But it sure ain’t complete without rounding it out with the original Petula Clark, now is it not?…

Whatchu think?



A Hipster Accusation

A few months ago I was alone in my Real Estate office. Usually Tom is there and he is the one who handles walk-ins. For some reason when I popped by to grab some paperwork no one was there. Tom most likely had a client walk in and had to leave to show them something. Our office is a small neighborhood office. We are a branch office of a large local company. So we work like that. Often there is someone around, most likely Tom, sometimes there’s a sign on the door saying sorry we missed you. It was a sorry we missed you moment so, although not prepared when I arrived, if someone walked in I was the man.

Someone, a couple, walked in. I introduced myself and they told me what they were looking for. Their home had sold in Santa Barbara and they were looking for an old eclectic neighborhood like the one surrounding our office. I did a search for them, found some listings that fit their needs and had some conversation that did initial vetting making sure they were real. I then shared the listings and some neighborhood history.

I then asked of they would like to get together later in the day or the next to maybe see a home or two. That’s when the husband excused himself outside and his wife dropped the bomb. “I’m sorry” she said, “We will need to ask if you have anyone else in your office that can help us”. Obviously noticing the puzzled look on my face she continued, “We just don’t understand you Hipsters with your beards and cuffed jeans. We need an agent that we can better relate to and trust.”

Hipster? Did she just call me a Hipster? I’m in my 50s, this couple was probably 45. I’m a Hipster?

I explained I was the only one in the office at the moment. I told her that if she desired they could come back in an hour or so and my associate would have returned as he was out on appointment at the moment, or if they wanted I was happy to set an appointment for them with him. She replied that they would find another company. I was fine with her decision. I don’t desire judgmental people in my life, nor do I care to work with them.

Yeah I get it, Fearsome is a big beard. I’ve had him, or a portion of him, as part of my facial features almost continuously since he first appeared around 1980. I also started cuffing my 501 jeans about 1980. I’ve worn them cuffed since that time as well. Big beards and cuffed jeans are commonplace and I had never considered them to be the sole indicators of Hipster. I was under the impression that Hipsters were a tad under 50, like maybe by 20 years under 50? Was I the first Hipster and never knew it until that day? Perhaps she mistook me for being 30 and this was a compliment?

Also…is there something I was unaware of?… are Hipsters an untrustworthy lot? Are they known for deceptional behaviors? Was I being accused? Of being untrustworthy…or just being judged at first sight?

Shedding the weight…

Mind, Body &  Spirit

I know in my life I can catch myself carrying around more than just a big ‘ole Fearsome Beard. I catch myself carrying some baggage from time to time. Unnecessary baggage. There are also times that I carry it without even realizing it. Carrying burdens for work, past & current relationships, family issues, guilt, unmet expectations, ….fill in blank here.

The body, like the mind, can carry some baggage too. Recently I noticed my scale took an uptick. I’m not overweight yet but I had been 170lbs for twenty years and suddenly I’m 180? WTF? Now I’m still thin but ….I used to try to gain 10lbs just to bulk up, I mean eat like crazy.  Suddenly 10 new ones outta no where without trying…I need to stay alert. Don’t get me wrong 180 is fine and I’m happy with it, but no more please. The mind and the body can also affect each other here.

Spirit, how would a spirit carry baggage? It could be my connection to spirit is blocked by something I’m carrying, feeling or doing. There are healthy ways to find the spirit and I believe unhealthy ones too. I need to work at this to keep it healthy.

As many of you know I do the Deepak Chopra free meditations a couple times a year when they are offered: 21 days, 20 minutes a day, guided and free in my e mail. I like them. A new one started today. If interested in joining me you can register for it today, or anytime during the next four days, free and not miss a one.

This one is titled: “Shedding the Weight: Mind, Body & Spirit” and if interested simply click HERE

So whatever I’m carrying from unnecessary stress to extra poundage, I hope to learn a healthier way of releasing it and letting go.


The human experience

If you are reading this, you are very likely human. In fact I would wager 99.99%human.

We share common experience and we share differed interpretations of these same common experiences. The key here is we share. If you have experienced it and I haven’t, the possibility is there that I could because it was a human experience. If you’ve experienced it and I have experienced it, the chances that our experience was interpreted exactly the same way are nil.

From conception the human experience is similar but different. The chemicals that entered your blood from your mother’s environment and consumption were not exactly the same as those that entered my blood from my mother. Yet the chance that I could encounter the chemicals you did is there as both of our mothers were human.

Does anyone get where I’m going here?

We may (you and I) be different yet we are both human. Our lives, experiences, interpretations, understanding and situations may be different or the same. The possibility is always there that I can sense something like you do, and the possibility is always there of difference. Both experiences are human and we are each capable of the experience. It’s a human experience.

I’m getting to empathy. Empathy for another who is different yet like myself.

Instead of conflict, anger, fear and worry …can we instead feel empathy?