“What actually is the function of worry?”

That quote comes from the 2014 season of Ru Paul’s Drag Race. It’s quite profound.

Adore Delano asks Courtney Act “What do you worry most about this competition?” To which Courtney replies “What actually is the function of worry?”

Ok… so first Fearsome has a couple of indulgences other than Major League Baseball, Comic-Con and Led Zeppelin. One of those other indulgences is he watches Ru Paul’s Drag Race. He got hooked the year Chad Michaels of San Diego was a contestant. Besides what could be equally an example of comfort with your own masculinity than having a beard? Wearing a dress? Well the point of this post is not to debate that, but to contemplate Courtney’s statement.

“What actually is the function of worry?”

It doesn’t accomplish anything actually. It takes time and energy. It causes stress. One can become obsessed with it. It doesn’t change an outcome. It can ruin your mood and your day.

Sure we all have negative thoughts that can lead to worry, but why worry? Why not let that negative thought pass and focus on a good outcome? Take a step in the direction of where you want to go? Get in the game of life and work to create something wonderful?

Fearsome believes it’s what we choose to focus on. How we each decide to look at it. We have the ability to choose, so why choose worry?


7 thoughts on ““What actually is the function of worry?”

  1. I absolutely believe your words. But I admit that I fail to live by them all too often.

    Eventually, I get there. I move. I act. But more often than not, I began with worry. I worry until I can’t take it anymore, and then I step toward change. In retrospect, I realize how wasteful this is. But I can’t seem to break the habit.

    On a positive note, (almost) daily meditation is helping.

    • Last night one half of a couple getting ready to walk the aisle in Montana contacted me worried to bits. He had not heard from his partner who flew from the local airport to Salt Lake City for a re-examination of chronic bone and pain issues. Day fell to night, no word. He has a disorder that heightens when meds change, and they did recently. At just 47 years old he’s aged so much, but his soon to be spouse and he have traveled tough roads and many sorrows, coming together to forge a better life – and they have overcome many things. I was giving him simple suggestions to calm his fears, like initiating a call (because the partner’s cellphone was not being answered) or calling the VA to find out his whereabouts. Our worries get the best of us when three things are present: doubt, trust and connection.

      • Need to fix the last line (grrrr!): Our worries get the best of us when three things troubling are present: doubt, trust and connection. There, fixed.

  2. YIKES! As much as I’ve never been able to understand drag, and Kurt used to inundate me with ‘Drag Race’ and ‘Project Run(a)way’ (which I did), there are occasional things that flow from this arena that are life lessons. Kitty Litter and Hedda Lettuce – two of the big names in NYC/P-Town – can also come up with a moment that makes you think. Much as I don’t understand cat-fights (especially when my twin sisters get it going =^.^=) I do get amidst the frivality and ego there are real people underneath the Maybelline and Prada; it is all for show anyhow. My take on myself goes much more organic; 38 years in ‘showbusinessness’ went in a completely different direction to make connection in real time, real ways, and not even I could have predicted how much ROFL and LOL would come from the everyday and ordinary. Thankfully the meaningful and connecting parts of what brings people together exist very well in these moments. As for zany, I’ll take Lucy and Ethyl (or the 21st Century version, Jaime and Adam) every time.

    • Some worry is justified; back in the 90s my dear friend Kris was telling us at work her husband would kill her one day; we begged her to get Police and her church involved and she refused. Three weeks later around the holidays she was murdered, and I passed by the scene at a local restaurant on my way to shopping. Her three beautiful children were robbed of mom and dad that day.

  3. There’s a saying I have had hanging in my tattoo room at the studio for almost a decade now, and I will probably tattoo it on myself in the coming months, because I need the reminder: “No point stressing out.
    One day you’ll be dead and none of this shit will matter…”. For me, stressing leads to worry. So if I can negate the stressing, then the worrying will (hopefully) be much less.

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